If you’ve fallen for a widower, you know very well that it takes great effort to make a relationship with him work. Dating a widower is challenging on many levels, which is why we’d like to help you by offering advice on which personality traits you need to nurture if you want to keep on dating someone who’s wife has passed away.
Trait #1: Patience
First and foremost, you need to be very patient with widowers because they’re rather fragile due to their grief. Even though the grief will never completely go away, they are still capable of having meaningful relationships with other women as long as those women understand where they’re coming from. Setting the bar too high for them to impress you will just discourage them, and so will being difficult and demanding. On the other hand, if you’re down-to-earth and flexible, willing to give him the time and space he needs to adjust to the fact that there is a new woman in his life, you’ll definitely score some major points and ensure you have a meaningful and fulfilling relationship in return.
Trait #2: Understanding
Understanding his needs, fear, and often shame for having moved on and found someone to be with is crucial for him to relax and be himself around you. He’ll feel safe in your company if he can trust you to respect the fact that he has heavy baggage, and once you establish that level of trust where he no longer feels he needs to hide who he is or what he’s been through, you can rest assured you’ve gotten under his skin. Nurture him like a small plant you want to see in full bloom come springtime, and you’ll get yourself a person you can depend and rely on to do the same for you.
Trait #3: Compassion
Unlike other dating niches, widower dating doesn’t come in all shapes and sizes. It’s always characterized by the same elements, including grief and shame, judgement by the inner circle for having moved on, and fear of commitment with another person whom they might also lose. This is why compassion goes a long way when dating a widower, and if you’re a widow yourself, you’ll perfectly understand what that means. It means not being too pushy, adjusting your expectations to the situation, and letting things take their course.